David MacGregor
Sunday 18th January 2009
1 Corinthians 6:11-20 - Evening Sermon 18/1/09
(blank slide)
Introduction
One morning a vicar got up into the pulpit, and started the service: "There's something wrong with the microphone", "And also with you" replied the congregation.
As a rule I like to start my sermons with a funny story or joke. However, for this evening's sermon I wondered long and hard about it simply because of the serious nature of the passage from Corinthians before us. As you will have noticed when it was read, Paul's main theme is sexual immorality, and it is a subject I approach with a real degree of trepidation - it's embarrassing to talk about, there is a real danger of hitting raw nerves, and of upsetting people. If I do do this, please accept my most sincere apologies. However, I feel that I must talk on the subject for 2 reasons:
Firstly, we live in a society that is absolutely obsessed by sex and sexual immorality, with the result that we are bombarded by it all the time - it's in our newspapers, our magazines, its on TV, and it is only ever a couple of clicks away on the internet. As christians, we simply cannot avoid it, and therefore we need to think about how we deal with it, as individuals and as a church.
Secondly, as it says in 2 Tim 3:16
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness."
So, if we come to a passage in the Bible, no matter how tempting it is to duck it, God has put it there for a reason, and we are duty bound to study it to see what God is saying through it.
Finally, I speak to you as one who is far from perfect in this area, and the words I speak I address to myself and my own weaknesses as much as to anyone else here.
Background
Before we start to look at the passage, let me put it in context for you.
In Paul's day, the city of Corinth had a population of about 250,000 free people and as many as 400,000 slaves. As with many other Greek cities, it had many temples to the various Greek gods. Of particular importance was the temple of Aphrodite, the goddess of love. The worship of Aphrodite encouraged prostitution in the name of religion, and at a time, there were as many as 1000 prostitutes serving in the temple. So widely known did the immorality of Corinth become, that the Greek verb "to corinthainise" came to mean "to practise sexual immorality". It was not surprising then that Paul had to write to the Corinthian church on this subject.
(click)
What is sex all about?
Before we move on to look at sexual immorality, I want to briefly remind ourselves what sex is all about.
(click)
The first and most important thing to say is that God invented sex. God has never looked down from heaven and in a shocked voice said, "Goodness me, what have those humans gone and invented now?" Sex is a gift from God, and of itself it is good and to be received gratefully.
(click)
Secondly, in Genesis 2:18, we read:
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
While sex is for procreation, I would suggest that part of its purpose, and possibly a more important, is to combat man's aloneness.
(click)
Thirdly, as with many other good gifts, God has put boundaries on where sex is to be enjoyed. God doesn't do this because he is a spoilsport, he does it because if we abuse his good gifts we hurt ourselves and each other. Let me take the simple analogy of food. Food is good and necessary for life, health and well-being but if we over eat, there are all sorts of negative consequences in terms of obesity, and other types of ill health. Similarly with sex, if we abuse this gift, there are all sorts of negative consequences for us and for others. And, as with over eating, the experience of misusing the gift may well be pleasurable, and the consequences may not be immediately apparent. But consequences there most assuredly will be.
I will talk a little more about the protective boundaries God puts round sex later.
(click)
Fourthly, in Matt 22:30 it says, "At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven."
I think that this implies that there will be no sex in heaven. Not so long ago, I found this a rather depressing thought, however in recent years I have completely changed my mind.
Let me try and explain.
Imagine if you were on a desert island with nothing but coconuts and water to live on. It is likely that you would crave for food, even such a simple thing as a slice of bread. Now imagine you are at a banquet, laid with all the most lovely food you could imagine - all thoughts of a simple slice of bread would be dispelled.
I think that it will be that way with sex in heaven. There won't be lots of hot blooded sex starved men constantly having to take cold showers. Rather, as we, the church, are united with Christ our heavenly bridegroom and all our loneliness and aloneness are dispelled, all desire for sex will disappear. And with it all the battling and wrestling with sexual temptation that so many of us face - hallelujah!!!
(click)
What are the boundaries that God has put around sex and why are they there?
One final section before we move on to sexual immorality - let us remind ourselves what the boundaries are that God has put around sex, and why they are there. Let me do this firstly by looking at what the Bible says on the subject, and then by trying to expand on why this makes good sense.
(click)
Let's start with Gen 2:18, 21 - 24
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man."
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
So we see right at the beginning, before sin entered the world, God established the pattern of one man and one woman being joined together as man and wife.
(click)
Next let's look at Malachi 2:13-16a
Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, "Why?" It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.
"I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel
Here, right at the end of the Old Testament, we see the message loud and clear that:
God intends marriage to be for life
marriage is to be between one man and one woman,
when two people marry God makes them one,
marriage is a covenant relationship, that is one where there is a binding agreement between the parties to the relationship,
God hates divorce.
(click - blank slide)
In Matt 19, Jesus quotes from the passage in Genesis 2, affirming its message and adding the instruction "what God has joined together, let man not separate.", in other words we must never work to break up a marriage.
Finally, in Ephesians 5, Paul compares the marriage relationship to that of Christ and the church - the ultimate in secure, loving and permanent relationships.
So the Bible is quite clear about the boundaries that God puts around sex, but it is less clear about why they are there. To an extent, the question is unnecessary - if the loving God who designed us, knows us intimately, and wants only what is best for us says don't do something, only a fool would do it.
Nonetheless, suppose I am a fool who needs more convincing, let me give you a couple of thoughts on why God has put these boundaries round sex.
Firstly, some years ago I came across an interesting chapter in Philip Yancey's book "Finding God in Unexpected Places", where he reports on some research by one JD Unwin in 1934. The author studied 86 different civilisations spread throughout the world, and over many hundreds of years of history. He looked at the relationship between absolute monogamy and how well societies fared. In all 86 cases he found that once a complete generation had inherited a tradition which did not insist upon complete monogamy, the society went downhill. Only when they returned to more rigid sexual standards did the societies start to flourish again.
Secondly, the physical act of having sex should be seen as only a subset of a greater whole.
At a deep level we all fear rejection, and so we all wear masks. And yet we all yearn for intimacy and acceptance of who we truly are. But to be accepted and loved for who we really are, we have to take off our masks.
Let me quote from John White's book "Eros Defiled" (p20, 21).
"Erotic pleasure is the most superficial benefit of sex. It is a delight, but only the delight of a moment. The bodily exposure that arouses and accompanies erotic pleasure can be both profoundly symbolic and powerfully healing. It symbolizes the uncovering of our inner selves, our deepest fears and yearnings.
It makes sense then that sexual relations be confined to marriage. For acceptance and mutual disclosure are not the activities of a moment but the delicate fabric of a lifetime's weaving. To assure their development they need the sturdy framework of sworn commitment buttressed by social laws......A marriage commitment is assurance against rejection and so allows for full self disclosure by both partners.
(click)
What is sexual immorality?
So far I have talked largely about the good side of sex. However, it is now time to move on and look at sexual immorality. Before looking at what the Bible has to teach about this topic, we need to try and define what we mean by sexual immorality in its broadest sense.
(click) In this evening's passage the word Paul uses for sexual immorality, pornea, could better be translated as illicit sexual intercourse, or as sex between two people who are not married to each other.
However, if we look across the whole sweep of the Bible, we find that it has quite a lot else to say on the subject:
(click) The 7th commandment in Ex 20:14 is, "You shall not commit adultery", that is a married person having sex with someone other than their spouse.
(click) In Leviticus 18, there is a whole list of banned sexual relationships, namely: no close relative, your mother, step-mother, sister, step-sister, granddaughter, aunt, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, any woman and her daughter, any woman during her period, your neighbour's wife, one man with another man, and sex with animals.
Clearly this list is pretty comprehensive, but.... there are gaps. What about pornography, masturbation, sexual fantasies, and 101 other variations on a theme? What I suppose the question is, is if the Bible doesn't specifically prohibit something, is it ok to do it?
If we go down this route there is a real danger that we become very legalistic, straining out gnats but swallowing camels, and we miss the point of what the Bible is talking about. Rather, as with so many other areas of our life, we need to take the commandments laid down in the Bible as our guide, and ask ourselves questions such as:
(click)(click)
Does the proposed course of action fit with loving God with all my heart, mind, soul & strength?
Is this honouring/loving towards anyone else involved?
Does this fit with what God designed sex for?
Will doing this honour God with my body?
Am I being mastered by my actions?
In asking such questions, we need to take great care in how we interpret the Bible, since inevitably we look at it through the lens of our own culture. Much as for the corinthians, where sleeping with prostitutes was the cultural norm, we need to take great care lest our cultural norms distort the truth in the Bible.
(click)
One final point I need to make before we move on is that there is a world of difference between temptation and sin.
It is one thing to walk past a pretty girl in the street and think - wow she's pretty. It is another to take a second lingering glance, to admire the curve of her hip, to imagine what lies beneath, to..to....... I'd better stop, I can feel my blood pressure rising, but I hope you get the point.
The battles I fight with sexual temptation are in regard to women, but if you are a woman and it is men that tempt you, or if you are a woman or man, and it is someone of the same sex where you are tempted, the point is still the same, temptation and sin are entirely different.
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What do we do about sexual immorality?
Let us move on now to think about what we do about sexual immorality. This is not an easy area, and simple answers are in short supply. I have wrestled long and hard as I have thought about the issues involved, and what I say now, I say more as a work in progress than as definitive answers.
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Let us start by reminding ourselves of the destiny of the church. In Eph 5:25-27 we read
"Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless."
This is where we are headed, this is our destiny. But we haven't arrived yet, but this is the goal, and the reason why we need to do battle with sin.
(click)
So what does the Bible have to say about sexual immorality? Superficially, its teaching is clear and simple:
(click) Firstly, sexual sin is serious. 1 Cor 6:18 says of sexual immorality: "All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body." Paul then reminds his readers that their bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit.
(click) However, in many cases it is not singled out for special mention. 1 Cor 6:9,10 says: "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God."
(click) Thirdly, we are to flee from sexual immorality, so much so that, as Eph 5:3 says, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people".
(click) Fourthly, sexual sin is not unforgivable. Following on immediately, after 1 Cor 6:9,10, in verse 11 Paul says "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God."
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But what then of those who fall, of those who are involved in sexual sin?
Let me start by asking you a question: You may never have slept with a prostitute, you may never have slept with your wife before you were married, but what man here could honestly say he has never looked lustfully at a woman other than his wife? Why do I ask this? Simply, so that as we consider those who have sinned sexually, we remind ourselves of our position as we stand before God. And if you never wrestle with sexual sin, thank God, it is a lifelong battle and not one I would wish on anyone, but for now remember the other battles you fight with sin, and come and stand alongside the rest of us, and remember the words "there but for the grace of God go I".
So, if you are someone who is involved with sexual immorality, if it is a one off, turn away from your sin, repent and come back to Jesus your saviour. Remember the reading we had from John's gospel about the woman caught in adultery. Follow Jesus instruction to her. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
But what if, as with so many who are involved in sexual immorality, you are addicted to your behaviour. Let me quote again from John White's book Eros Defiled, as he talks about people with various sexual perversions.
"The majority are unhappy, inadequate and lonely. Something has gone wrong that causes them to be excited in a way that makes them take stupid risks, only to find that it was not worth it, and that they despise themselves in deepening depression for what they do, and for being what they are.
If you are like many people I know, somewhere near the root of your habit lies a lack of respect for yourself. When no one is watching you, when you are alone and quiet, is it not true that you sometimes feel certain that you are no good? That you (not just your behaviour but you yourself) are despicable? ....,And nothing is more destructive of hope than to secretly hate, despise, or despair of oneself.
You are not despicable. You were made in the image of God. That image in you may have been defaced, yet still it is there. ....Behind the ugliness and sin you are of more innate worth than the whole universe of stars and suns.
But you will never feel this way about yourself until you take the risk of exposing your inner self - of revealing what you are ashamed of - to someone else."
John White goes on to recommend caution in choosing who to talk to, and suggests seeking a professional counsellor, or a member of the clergy.
He then goes on:
"There is a God in heaven...not only did he make you; he has made provision to make you whole. .....the Jesus who burst from the tomb came to heal such as you. "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick", he once said. ...The problem you hide is at the same time a sickness and a sin. From him it draws only compassion and love."
Finally, then, how should we, as a church, react to those involved in sexual immorality? Clearly if the person in question is breaking the law, it is our duty to report the matter to the police. However, the vast vast majority of sexual immorality is within the law, so how should we react to those involved in such behaviour?
To answer this question, we need to think about 4 categories of people:
1. Those outside the church who are involved in sexual immorality.
As Paul says in 1 Cor 5:9 & 10. If we weren't to associate with these people, we would have to leave the world. In Paul's view it was fine to associate with such people. Not least because it was people such as these that Jesus came to seek and to save.
2. Those inside the church who are involved in sexual immorality.
Here I draw a distinction between those who are involved, who know it to be wrong, yet choose to continue in their behaviour, without regret or repentance, and those who struggle with their sin, who do battle with it and from time to time fall. For the first of these two categories in 1 Cor 5:11 Paul has some pretty harsh words, where he says "But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat." While there is a place for such a course of action, it is one that I feel should only be a last resort, and it is a decision that should be taken by the whole church leadership.
3. Those inside the church who struggle with sexual immorality, who battle with their own sinfulness, and from time to time fall.
For this category of person, let me quote from John White again. "Such people need Christian forgiveness, acceptance, compassion and professional help. We must insist that they get the latter and we must do all in our power to see they get a Christian friend, with whom they can come clean and with whom they can pray, who can be their trusted entree into Christian society. For such men and women, more than any of us, need both the discipline and the support of the church. They need around them people who know them and love them."
4. Those who might be victims of the sexually immoral.
My immediate reaction is CRB checks for all who work with children and other vulnerable people, and while I agree that keeping up to date with them is important, this area is wider than this. As a church, if we know someone has a particular weakness, be it to do with sexual immorality, or something else, to ask or allow them to do something that will put them directly into the way of temptation is as unfair on them, as it is thoughtless of the potential victims. We truly need to be wise as serpents.
In conclusion then, if what I have been saying has been particularly pertinent to you, can I recommend getting hold of the book I have quoted from several times, Eros Defiled: The Problem of Sexual Guilt by John White. I have a copy here, or you can buy it from Amazon for less than £10.
Let us pray
(pause)
Lord we thank you for the gift of sex, for all the closeness and pleasure it brings. And yet, we are aware of all the damage it causes when misused. Father, where we have sinned and fallen short of your ideals with regard to sex, forgive us. We turn from our sin and turn back to you. Help us to flee from sexual temptation, and to stay close to you. Give us the strength, the desire and the courage to stand for you.
And as a church, help us to support each other that we may increasingly become a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
In Jesus name Amen.
1 Corinthians 6:11-20 - Evening Sermon 18/1/09
(blank slide)
Introduction
One morning a vicar got up into the pulpit, and started the service: "There's something wrong with the microphone", "And also with you" replied the congregation.
As a rule I like to start my sermons with a funny story or joke. However, for this evening's sermon I wondered long and hard about it simply because of the serious nature of the passage from Corinthians before us. As you will have noticed when it was read, Paul's main theme is sexual immorality, and it is a subject I approach with a real degree of trepidation - it's embarrassing to talk about, there is a real danger of hitting raw nerves, and of upsetting people. If I do do this, please accept my most sincere apologies. However, I feel that I must talk on the subject for 2 reasons:
Firstly, we live in a society that is absolutely obsessed by sex and sexual immorality, with the result that we are bombarded by it all the time - it's in our newspapers, our magazines, its on TV, and it is only ever a couple of clicks away on the internet. As christians, we simply cannot avoid it, and therefore we need to think about how we deal with it, as individuals and as a church.
Secondly, as it says in 2 Tim 3:16
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness."
So, if we come to a passage in the Bible, no matter how tempting it is to duck it, God has put it there for a reason, and we are duty bound to study it to see what God is saying through it.
Finally, I speak to you as one who is far from perfect in this area, and the words I speak I address to myself and my own weaknesses as much as to anyone else here.
Background
Before we start to look at the passage, let me put it in context for you.
In Paul's day, the city of Corinth had a population of about 250,000 free people and as many as 400,000 slaves. As with many other Greek cities, it had many temples to the various Greek gods. Of particular importance was the temple of Aphrodite, the goddess of love. The worship of Aphrodite encouraged prostitution in the name of religion, and at a time, there were as many as 1000 prostitutes serving in the temple. So widely known did the immorality of Corinth become, that the Greek verb "to corinthainise" came to mean "to practise sexual immorality". It was not surprising then that Paul had to write to the Corinthian church on this subject.
(click)
What is sex all about?
Before we move on to look at sexual immorality, I want to briefly remind ourselves what sex is all about.
(click)
The first and most important thing to say is that God invented sex. God has never looked down from heaven and in a shocked voice said, "Goodness me, what have those humans gone and invented now?" Sex is a gift from God, and of itself it is good and to be received gratefully.
(click)
Secondly, in Genesis 2:18, we read:
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
While sex is for procreation, I would suggest that part of its purpose, and possibly a more important, is to combat man's aloneness.
(click)
Thirdly, as with many other good gifts, God has put boundaries on where sex is to be enjoyed. God doesn't do this because he is a spoilsport, he does it because if we abuse his good gifts we hurt ourselves and each other. Let me take the simple analogy of food. Food is good and necessary for life, health and well-being but if we over eat, there are all sorts of negative consequences in terms of obesity, and other types of ill health. Similarly with sex, if we abuse this gift, there are all sorts of negative consequences for us and for others. And, as with over eating, the experience of misusing the gift may well be pleasurable, and the consequences may not be immediately apparent. But consequences there most assuredly will be.
I will talk a little more about the protective boundaries God puts round sex later.
(click)
Fourthly, in Matt 22:30 it says, "At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven."
I think that this implies that there will be no sex in heaven. Not so long ago, I found this a rather depressing thought, however in recent years I have completely changed my mind.
Let me try and explain.
Imagine if you were on a desert island with nothing but coconuts and water to live on. It is likely that you would crave for food, even such a simple thing as a slice of bread. Now imagine you are at a banquet, laid with all the most lovely food you could imagine - all thoughts of a simple slice of bread would be dispelled.
I think that it will be that way with sex in heaven. There won't be lots of hot blooded sex starved men constantly having to take cold showers. Rather, as we, the church, are united with Christ our heavenly bridegroom and all our loneliness and aloneness are dispelled, all desire for sex will disappear. And with it all the battling and wrestling with sexual temptation that so many of us face - hallelujah!!!
(click)
What are the boundaries that God has put around sex and why are they there?
One final section before we move on to sexual immorality - let us remind ourselves what the boundaries are that God has put around sex, and why they are there. Let me do this firstly by looking at what the Bible says on the subject, and then by trying to expand on why this makes good sense.
(click)
Let's start with Gen 2:18, 21 - 24
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man."
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
So we see right at the beginning, before sin entered the world, God established the pattern of one man and one woman being joined together as man and wife.
(click)
Next let's look at Malachi 2:13-16a
Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, "Why?" It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.
"I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel
Here, right at the end of the Old Testament, we see the message loud and clear that:
God intends marriage to be for life
marriage is to be between one man and one woman,
when two people marry God makes them one,
marriage is a covenant relationship, that is one where there is a binding agreement between the parties to the relationship,
God hates divorce.
(click - blank slide)
In Matt 19, Jesus quotes from the passage in Genesis 2, affirming its message and adding the instruction "what God has joined together, let man not separate.", in other words we must never work to break up a marriage.
Finally, in Ephesians 5, Paul compares the marriage relationship to that of Christ and the church - the ultimate in secure, loving and permanent relationships.
So the Bible is quite clear about the boundaries that God puts around sex, but it is less clear about why they are there. To an extent, the question is unnecessary - if the loving God who designed us, knows us intimately, and wants only what is best for us says don't do something, only a fool would do it.
Nonetheless, suppose I am a fool who needs more convincing, let me give you a couple of thoughts on why God has put these boundaries round sex.
Firstly, some years ago I came across an interesting chapter in Philip Yancey's book "Finding God in Unexpected Places", where he reports on some research by one JD Unwin in 1934. The author studied 86 different civilisations spread throughout the world, and over many hundreds of years of history. He looked at the relationship between absolute monogamy and how well societies fared. In all 86 cases he found that once a complete generation had inherited a tradition which did not insist upon complete monogamy, the society went downhill. Only when they returned to more rigid sexual standards did the societies start to flourish again.
Secondly, the physical act of having sex should be seen as only a subset of a greater whole.
At a deep level we all fear rejection, and so we all wear masks. And yet we all yearn for intimacy and acceptance of who we truly are. But to be accepted and loved for who we really are, we have to take off our masks.
Let me quote from John White's book "Eros Defiled" (p20, 21).
"Erotic pleasure is the most superficial benefit of sex. It is a delight, but only the delight of a moment. The bodily exposure that arouses and accompanies erotic pleasure can be both profoundly symbolic and powerfully healing. It symbolizes the uncovering of our inner selves, our deepest fears and yearnings.
It makes sense then that sexual relations be confined to marriage. For acceptance and mutual disclosure are not the activities of a moment but the delicate fabric of a lifetime's weaving. To assure their development they need the sturdy framework of sworn commitment buttressed by social laws......A marriage commitment is assurance against rejection and so allows for full self disclosure by both partners.
(click)
What is sexual immorality?
So far I have talked largely about the good side of sex. However, it is now time to move on and look at sexual immorality. Before looking at what the Bible has to teach about this topic, we need to try and define what we mean by sexual immorality in its broadest sense.
(click) In this evening's passage the word Paul uses for sexual immorality, pornea, could better be translated as illicit sexual intercourse, or as sex between two people who are not married to each other.
However, if we look across the whole sweep of the Bible, we find that it has quite a lot else to say on the subject:
(click) The 7th commandment in Ex 20:14 is, "You shall not commit adultery", that is a married person having sex with someone other than their spouse.
(click) In Leviticus 18, there is a whole list of banned sexual relationships, namely: no close relative, your mother, step-mother, sister, step-sister, granddaughter, aunt, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, any woman and her daughter, any woman during her period, your neighbour's wife, one man with another man, and sex with animals.
Clearly this list is pretty comprehensive, but.... there are gaps. What about pornography, masturbation, sexual fantasies, and 101 other variations on a theme? What I suppose the question is, is if the Bible doesn't specifically prohibit something, is it ok to do it?
If we go down this route there is a real danger that we become very legalistic, straining out gnats but swallowing camels, and we miss the point of what the Bible is talking about. Rather, as with so many other areas of our life, we need to take the commandments laid down in the Bible as our guide, and ask ourselves questions such as:
(click)(click)
Does the proposed course of action fit with loving God with all my heart, mind, soul & strength?
Is this honouring/loving towards anyone else involved?
Does this fit with what God designed sex for?
Will doing this honour God with my body?
Am I being mastered by my actions?
In asking such questions, we need to take great care in how we interpret the Bible, since inevitably we look at it through the lens of our own culture. Much as for the corinthians, where sleeping with prostitutes was the cultural norm, we need to take great care lest our cultural norms distort the truth in the Bible.
(click)
One final point I need to make before we move on is that there is a world of difference between temptation and sin.
It is one thing to walk past a pretty girl in the street and think - wow she's pretty. It is another to take a second lingering glance, to admire the curve of her hip, to imagine what lies beneath, to..to....... I'd better stop, I can feel my blood pressure rising, but I hope you get the point.
The battles I fight with sexual temptation are in regard to women, but if you are a woman and it is men that tempt you, or if you are a woman or man, and it is someone of the same sex where you are tempted, the point is still the same, temptation and sin are entirely different.
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What do we do about sexual immorality?
Let us move on now to think about what we do about sexual immorality. This is not an easy area, and simple answers are in short supply. I have wrestled long and hard as I have thought about the issues involved, and what I say now, I say more as a work in progress than as definitive answers.
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Let us start by reminding ourselves of the destiny of the church. In Eph 5:25-27 we read
"Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless."
This is where we are headed, this is our destiny. But we haven't arrived yet, but this is the goal, and the reason why we need to do battle with sin.
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So what does the Bible have to say about sexual immorality? Superficially, its teaching is clear and simple:
(click) Firstly, sexual sin is serious. 1 Cor 6:18 says of sexual immorality: "All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body." Paul then reminds his readers that their bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit.
(click) However, in many cases it is not singled out for special mention. 1 Cor 6:9,10 says: "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God."
(click) Thirdly, we are to flee from sexual immorality, so much so that, as Eph 5:3 says, "But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people".
(click) Fourthly, sexual sin is not unforgivable. Following on immediately, after 1 Cor 6:9,10, in verse 11 Paul says "And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God."
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But what then of those who fall, of those who are involved in sexual sin?
Let me start by asking you a question: You may never have slept with a prostitute, you may never have slept with your wife before you were married, but what man here could honestly say he has never looked lustfully at a woman other than his wife? Why do I ask this? Simply, so that as we consider those who have sinned sexually, we remind ourselves of our position as we stand before God. And if you never wrestle with sexual sin, thank God, it is a lifelong battle and not one I would wish on anyone, but for now remember the other battles you fight with sin, and come and stand alongside the rest of us, and remember the words "there but for the grace of God go I".
So, if you are someone who is involved with sexual immorality, if it is a one off, turn away from your sin, repent and come back to Jesus your saviour. Remember the reading we had from John's gospel about the woman caught in adultery. Follow Jesus instruction to her. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
But what if, as with so many who are involved in sexual immorality, you are addicted to your behaviour. Let me quote again from John White's book Eros Defiled, as he talks about people with various sexual perversions.
"The majority are unhappy, inadequate and lonely. Something has gone wrong that causes them to be excited in a way that makes them take stupid risks, only to find that it was not worth it, and that they despise themselves in deepening depression for what they do, and for being what they are.
If you are like many people I know, somewhere near the root of your habit lies a lack of respect for yourself. When no one is watching you, when you are alone and quiet, is it not true that you sometimes feel certain that you are no good? That you (not just your behaviour but you yourself) are despicable? ....,And nothing is more destructive of hope than to secretly hate, despise, or despair of oneself.
You are not despicable. You were made in the image of God. That image in you may have been defaced, yet still it is there. ....Behind the ugliness and sin you are of more innate worth than the whole universe of stars and suns.
But you will never feel this way about yourself until you take the risk of exposing your inner self - of revealing what you are ashamed of - to someone else."
John White goes on to recommend caution in choosing who to talk to, and suggests seeking a professional counsellor, or a member of the clergy.
He then goes on:
"There is a God in heaven...not only did he make you; he has made provision to make you whole. .....the Jesus who burst from the tomb came to heal such as you. "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick", he once said. ...The problem you hide is at the same time a sickness and a sin. From him it draws only compassion and love."
Finally, then, how should we, as a church, react to those involved in sexual immorality? Clearly if the person in question is breaking the law, it is our duty to report the matter to the police. However, the vast vast majority of sexual immorality is within the law, so how should we react to those involved in such behaviour?
To answer this question, we need to think about 4 categories of people:
1. Those outside the church who are involved in sexual immorality.
As Paul says in 1 Cor 5:9 & 10. If we weren't to associate with these people, we would have to leave the world. In Paul's view it was fine to associate with such people. Not least because it was people such as these that Jesus came to seek and to save.
2. Those inside the church who are involved in sexual immorality.
Here I draw a distinction between those who are involved, who know it to be wrong, yet choose to continue in their behaviour, without regret or repentance, and those who struggle with their sin, who do battle with it and from time to time fall. For the first of these two categories in 1 Cor 5:11 Paul has some pretty harsh words, where he says "But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat." While there is a place for such a course of action, it is one that I feel should only be a last resort, and it is a decision that should be taken by the whole church leadership.
3. Those inside the church who struggle with sexual immorality, who battle with their own sinfulness, and from time to time fall.
For this category of person, let me quote from John White again. "Such people need Christian forgiveness, acceptance, compassion and professional help. We must insist that they get the latter and we must do all in our power to see they get a Christian friend, with whom they can come clean and with whom they can pray, who can be their trusted entree into Christian society. For such men and women, more than any of us, need both the discipline and the support of the church. They need around them people who know them and love them."
4. Those who might be victims of the sexually immoral.
My immediate reaction is CRB checks for all who work with children and other vulnerable people, and while I agree that keeping up to date with them is important, this area is wider than this. As a church, if we know someone has a particular weakness, be it to do with sexual immorality, or something else, to ask or allow them to do something that will put them directly into the way of temptation is as unfair on them, as it is thoughtless of the potential victims. We truly need to be wise as serpents.
In conclusion then, if what I have been saying has been particularly pertinent to you, can I recommend getting hold of the book I have quoted from several times, Eros Defiled: The Problem of Sexual Guilt by John White. I have a copy here, or you can buy it from Amazon for less than £10.
Let us pray
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Lord we thank you for the gift of sex, for all the closeness and pleasure it brings. And yet, we are aware of all the damage it causes when misused. Father, where we have sinned and fallen short of your ideals with regard to sex, forgive us. We turn from our sin and turn back to you. Help us to flee from sexual temptation, and to stay close to you. Give us the strength, the desire and the courage to stand for you.
And as a church, help us to support each other that we may increasingly become a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
In Jesus name Amen.
